Category Archives: Personal

Facelift

Danica's Eye - Photograph copyright Rhonda ParrishIt was time. This blog needed a facelift, so yesterday instead of tackling anything on my freaking epic to-do list, I changed up the blog’s layout. Because that is how I roll 😉

So now it’s all new and different and I’m trying to stop tweaking things and give it some time so I can get used to it and decide if I like it LoL

There’s an annoying thing that has happened to the most recent dozen or so blog posts I made though. See, first I installed a free version of this layout, and then went through all the blog posts that would show on my front page and set featured images for them. I had to do that, you see, in order to have thumbnails show up on the front page. That wasn’t a big deal except that as soon as I set the featured image the blog post incorporated that image into itself. Still not a big deal, it just meant I had to delete the original occurrence of the picture so that there wouldn’t be duplicates.

But then I decided to upgrade the theme to a paid version.

Once I did that the blog stopped automatically integrating the featured images into the blog posts they are associated with >_<

There is an option I can select which will make them start doing that again, but really, I’d rather they didn’t (as it gives me more control over where the pictures go) but also, I’m too lazy to go back through the last twelve posts to re-add the pictures. So if you happen to look at some of the older posts and you’re going ‘Uh, no pictures?’, well, now you know why.

Other than that and the usual number of little bumps along the road the transition has been pretty smooth.

So what do you think of my new layout? Love it? Hate it? Prefer the old one?

Social Media Changes Everything

Social media makes everything different. It really does.

I had a rough few days this week (which means my family did too) that included numerous trips to different doctors, three EKGs, a load of blood tests and spending ten hours in the emergency room.

Spoiler: I’m okay. Not 100% yet, but getting there.

The reason social media comes into this is because I was like… how much do I share? Where do I share it? Does anyone care to hear about these little dramas that afflict my life, or is sharing that just attention-whoring? If I do tell the story, what angle do I take? “Shit be scary”, “Emergency rooms are an amazing study of human nature”, “Just the facts, ma’am”, “Ten freaking hours in emerg?!?!” or something totally different?

Ten years ago these things wouldn’t have ever occurred to me. I would have called my Mom (once things were resolved probably–I wouldn’t want to worry her) and possibly emailed a couple friends, but mostly people would have learned, or not learned, about my little scare slowly over weeks and months as we ran into one another socially. That’s all different now.

I have friends, family and acquaintances online. I have a following. It’s not a big one LOL but it exists.

That all changes things.

Now I have to figure out what to share, how much of it to share, and where to share it. The Twitter crowd isn’t the same as the Facebook or blog one…

What about you? Do you have a policy of sorts, or do you figure it out as you go? I’m doing the latter, but seriously thinking about coming up with some sort of policy… even though history has shown I’m not fabulous at sticking to them LoL

Anyway, I’m back at work, though at a slightly slower pace than usual. So if you were waiting to hear from me you ought to soon 🙂

That Reminds Me…

I watched this video this afternoon (the cat on my lap was *not* impressed, let me tell you) and it made me smile:

My smile had a little something to do with the pissed off cat, a little something to do with the dog in the video and a whole lot to do with memories from my childhood.

As a kid I lived in and around (on farms) a handful of different small towns in southern Alberta. For as long as I can remember my grandmother has lived (and still does) in Nanton, Alberta. We lived there too when I was quite young, from about 4 until 9 or 10. I went to kindergarten in ‘the old school’ there the last year it was open and grade one at A. B. Daley School the first year it opened. When I left my first husband it was Nanton that I moved to with my very young daughter to do the single mother thing, and I lived there for a few years before moving up here to Edmonton to be with Jo.

Many of my happy memories from my childhood in Nanton have to do with summer (let’s just say I never fit in at school LoL).

Nanton used to have a noon whistle. It’s my understanding that it was actually an air raid siren, but since it was peacetime it had been re-purposed. Every day when there was no school (so summer and weekends) my brother, cousins and I were sort of let loose on the town. We had bicycles, a season’s pass to the swimming pool and active imaginations, what more did we need? And every day we knew it was time to come home for lunch when we heard the noon whistle.

Actually, we knew it was time to come home for lunch when we heard every single dog in town begin to howl.

The dogs always started to bark and howl a couple seconds before the siren went off.

I guess they could hear it before we could and it must have hurt their ears, poor things, because let me tell you — no matter where you were in town, when that siren went off, you heard it.

Anyway, that video reminded me of those days. “Simpler” days. You can’t go back, but sometimes it’s nice to remember and smile.

I don’t know when they stopped the noon whistle, but I bet all the animals in town, especially those who lived nearby, were grateful when they did 🙂

Anyway, I just wanted to share that and it was a few too many characters for Twitter or Facebook LOL I’ll try to make my next post writing-related 😉

Looking Back at 2013

Rearview -- Photo by Rhonda ParrishWhat a year. To say it’s been exponentially better than last year would be a huge understatement, but at the same time, it’s been far from perfect. It’s that time again when I look over my goals, see how well I did, celebrate the good things and figure out how to fail better at the others next year.

I’ll list my goals for 2013 below, bolding the ones I figure I accomplished and addressing each briefly. I don’t want to turn this into a novel-length blog post 😉

Health

  • Lose 25lbs
  • Successfully complete the P90x program (I’m giving myself permission to swap Cardio X workouts in for Plyometric ones because I worry about my ankle and also, I’m a bit of a wussy)
  • No energy drinks
  • Significantly cut the amount of sugar in my diet. I have a complicated set of rules for this for myself, but I don’t want to bore everyone with sharing them.

Right. So I totally fell down on pretty much all my health goals (though I mostly managed to avoid Red Bull).  I’m not even sure what happened to tell the truth, I just never managed to get back into the habit of working out and watching what I ate. This needs to be my primary focus for next year though because if I’m unhealthy everything else falls apart too. I may need help remembering that over the coming months though, so I’ll have to figure out a way to address that when I set my goals for 2014.

School

  • Begin another course (or two) toward my degree no later than April 1st and complete it/them successfully.

I took Psychology 304 – Research Methods in Psychology (which is required for my degree) and passed it with a B+. A very irritating B+. I was point five percent away from an A. >_<

Editing/Publishing

  • Sell my cancer anthology idea to a publisher.*
  • Edit the cancer anthology, making sure the end result is something I am proud of.
  • Promote the hell out of the anthology, ensuring that there actually are royalties to donate to charity.
  • Continue to pursue my sekkrit projeckt with CJD
  • Increase Niteblade’s readership and distribution
  • Begin offering Niteblade in more file formats
  • Hold a successful fundraiser for Niteblade
  • Produce a NaNoLJers anthology if sufficient interest exists

Metastasis Cover FinalI sold the Metastasis anthology idea to Wolfsinger Publications and edited the hell out of that thing. I am *SO* freaking proud of this book. So proud, and my mother (who I dedicated my efforts to) would be as well. We’re still in the process of ‘promoting the hell out of it’ and our first statements haven’t come out so I’m not sure how sales are going yet. Fingers crossed though… and if they aren’t where we want them to be, well, I guess I’ll just have to put some more time in.

This year I did increase Niteblade’s readership, distribution and the number of file formats it is available in. We also held a super successful fundraiser (raising $604!) and even adopted a chimpanzee.

While I did check to see if there was interest in a NaNoLJers anthology, there didn’t seem to be. Maybe next year… And my sekkrit projekt kind of got left behind a bit this year, but maybe that’s something I can look to a little closer in 2014 as well because I sure wasn’t slacking when it came to editing projects this year.

In addition to Metastasis and Niteblade, I’m also working on an anthology with World Weaver Press. You may have heard of it, it’s this little thing I like to call Fae. And I also broke ground on the first of what is going to be a huge series of anthologies, A is for Apocalypse.

Writing

  • Participate in The Whittaker Prize
  • Successfully complete the weekly version of Write 1 Sub 1. For the ‘Write’ portion of this challenge I will count completed short stories or poems as well as individual scenes from longer works. By allowing myself to count individual scenes I will be able to work on longer works and still participate in W1S1
  • Participate in Writo De Mayo
  • NaNoWriMo and both camp NaNoWriMos are all optional
  • Finish writing poems for all the 2012 NovPad prompts
  • Actually successfully complete the AprilPad or NovPad properly, without having to make up prompts after the month has passed
  • Self-publish “Aphanasian Stories”
  • Look into the practicality of bundling and re-releasing some of my previously published short stories as ebooks
  • Follow through on my 2012 plans for my zombie poetry

Tesseracts 17Well, you win some you lose some, right?

For example, I participated in The Whittaker Prize (well, this year’s incarnation was the Not-Whittaker Prize) but when it carried over into November, when I was trying to do All.The.Things including NaNoWriMo I decided to drop out for my own sanity. I was successful with NaNoWriMo however… but then I totally haven’t written another word on my novel (which needs about 30,000 more of them) since then. >_<

I did participate in Writo De Mayo where my primary goal was to transcribe a family history my grandmother had written and format it as a book to give to her. I did, and she loved it very much making the month’s worth of work well, well, worth the effort. (Alas, now she has edited the proof copy so guess what I’m doing in May 2014? LOL).

I also self-published Aphanasian Stories. Sales have been pretty lame (read: nearly non-existent) but I’m glad those stories are out there and available to an audience who might want them, if not today, perhaps tomorrow. Plus, the reviewers seem to like them, so that’s good for my ego 🙂

I’m looking at bundling some of my other previously published short stories to re-sell as ebooks but right now I don’t have enough which aren’t under contract that have common themes, so that’s something I’ll have to look at again next year.

As for the zombie poetry collection? It’s a work in progress. Hopefully I’ll have something to show for it before the end of the year, but I don’t want to rush through and create an inferior product. Because.

Under the writing umbrella for 2013 I’ve had a fantastic year. I’ve produced some stories I’m really, super proud of, and many of them have found homes with dream publishers. Highlights definitely include being published by Tesseracts 17: Speculating Canada from Coast to Coast, work forthcoming in Kzine, Mythic Delirium and the Trafficking in Magick anthology, poetry publications with Every Day Poets and especially the story I co-wrote with Jo for Masked Mosaic: Canadian Super Stories.

Reading

  • Read at least 30 books

As of today I’ve read 47 published books. I’ve also been privileged enough to read one soon-to-be published book as a critiquer and a couple anthologies I may have mentioned above. I also read a crapload of short stories as submissions to Niteblade and those anthologies, so overall I think I crushed this goal 😉

A Month of LettersMisc

  • Participate in A Month of Letters
  • Do the Blogging from A to Z Challenge (bonus points if I come up with a theme this year)
  • Blog at least once a week
  • Take a social media retreat for one week a month all year
  • Attend WorldCon 2012 in Texas
  • Post writing prompts/exercises in NaNoLJers on odd numbered Mondays
  • Run and participate in the writing bingo in NaNoLJers
  • Don’t forget that life is for living, not leveling

I did well on these ones 🙂 Sadly I didn’t make it to WorldCon, we had some unexpected expenses that needed to be dealt with (stoopid money) and I kinda sucked at putting prompts up for NaNoLJers but other than that I rocked the goals in this area. My month of letters was a lot of fun and I still write to several of the people I met that month (in addition to the friends I’ve always written to — I’ve fallen behind on that, but working on catching up. Let’s blame a crazy autumn, okay?), I did the Blogging from A to Z Challenge with a theme (Niteblade), ran the writing bingo at NaNoLJers and significantly cut back on the amount of time I spend playing World of Warcraft.

My social media retreats have gone very well, except for during the times when I’m in the midst of a promotion or such and need to pop on at least once a day because of that. I think next year I’m going to set a daily time limit for social media stuff rather than trying to avoid it completely for one week of the month. I think it will be better for consistency and also my sanity. Taking a break has definitely been good for my productivity though, and my state of mind. It’s really easy to get caught in a loop when every time something happens you think ‘I need to tweet this!’ Stepping away regularly definitely helped me shift my perspective and live a more balanced life. And that’s what it’s all about, right?

In the next little while I’ll look at my goals for 2014 and share those here, but in the meantime I think I’m going to bask a little bit in the glow of a year which, while it wasn’t perfect, was pretty damn good.

Dear Santa (2013)

It’s become a tradition on my blog that each year I write a letter to Santa about what I want for Giftmas. Not because I want any of my blog readers to buy me those things, but just because sometimes it’s fun to put together wishlists. If you make a Giftmas (or any other winter holiday) wishlist please leave a link in the comments so I can stop by and take a look 🙂

Dear Santa,

This year has been pretty good, especially compared to last year, and if we don’t count diet I’ve been pretty good. So with that in mind I don’t feel bad writing and asking you for a few things…

  • CMPunkHoodieI started watching wrestling again this year, Santa, and though I have a few items from the WWEShop I don’t feel like my wardrobe has been sufficiently wrestling-ified. I like most of the wrestlers (except the Wyatt Family and The Real Americans) so I’m not super particular about what you get me. Though, if I had to choose I’d really like CM Punk’s retro hoodie, The Shield’s sweatpants and The Usos T-shirt

 

  • I’m always looking for more books, Santa. You could check my Amazon wishlist or my Goodreads ‘Want to Read’ list, but both of those are incomplete. I really love short stories so best of anthologies are a pretty safe bet, and I could use a new vegetarian cookbook as well (bonus points for slow cooker recipes because finding meatless ones that aren’t spaghetti sauce is a freaking challenge). Also, I know I have Code Name Verity on my kobo, but I think I also need a physical copy of it. Because reasons.

 

  • I haven’t had any new jewelry in quite a long time, so maybe it’s time to change that. I am big on silver and sort of simple designs, and when I did a quick google to find some examples for you, Santa, I found this lovely ring which comes in silver but also in this metal I’ve never seen before. It’s lovely. I’m including a picture below for you. Pretty, no?

31117917_920831_ED_M

  • Finally Santa, you know how for the past two years I’ve asked you for “some baseboards and riser thingers for my bathroom and kitchen. If we don’t finish them up soon they are just going to blend into the background and we’ll never get them done.” Well, you’ll never guess what I still need this year. Yeah. Those. If you have room in your sleigh that would be super awesome, thank you.

Thank you Santa.

Love,

Rhonda

I’ll leave you with two movies today. The first is White Wine in the Sun by Tim Minchin. Last year I described this as ‘One of my favourite performers performing one of my favourite Christmas songs’. It’s still that, and it still makes me cry.

The second movie is a montage that totally reminds me of Tre (our dog) and Eowyn (our grumpiest cat). Maybe it will make you laugh 🙂

Happy Ho Ho!

 

Happy Anniversary!

Me And Jo

Happy Halloween to you, and Happy Anniversary to Jo and me 🙂

The picture there is the most recent one I have of Jo and I together. It was taken at the book signing for Masked Mosaic: Canadian Super Stories in February. Jo and I co-wrote a story that was included in that book, Sea and Sky. Anyway… this isn’t about that book, it’s about our anniversary 🙂

Today is our 9th anniversary. Ask me how I know it’s the 9th… c’mon, ask me. I know it’s the 9th because Danica is in grade ten and she was in grade one when we got married. That is also how Jo knows it’s our 9th anniversary. We are so screwed once Danica graduates from school LOL It’s kind of appropriate that we keep track of our anniversaries that way, though. I don’t know that we would have gotten married it if weren’t for Dani. We both loved each other very much but we didn’t really feel like we needed a ceremony to prove that however Danica really wanted us to be married, it meant a lot to her and so we did. Now I’m happy that we did. We didn’t need a ceremony to prove anything, but there’s something that really appeals to me about being Jo’s wife and partner.

Now, you don’t need to run away, I’m not going to spend a whole blog post gushing about how much I love him but I do want to share one short story with you that will illustrate just how awesome he is.

A few years ago I was all like ‘Gawd, I need a new job!’ and Jo said, “Well, if you could do anything in the world what would it be?” I replied, “Writing, but that will never happen.” Jo looked at me, I mean really looked at me and said, “Why not?” Why not indeed. If not for that question I might still be stuck in a job I hated and so many stories I’m incredibly proud of would never have been written.

Thank you for being awesome Jo. You rock and I love you.

And now… back to business.

Anniversary or not, today is also the last day for two work-related things. It’s the last day you can enter my draw for a goodie bag full of awesome:

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Metastasis Cover - artwork by Jonathan Parrish, Cover design by Carol HightshoeIt’s also the last day to get your copy of Metastasis at a discount:

Amazon.com
Paperback – $14.95
Kindle – $6.95

Kobo
ePub – $6.95

Smashwords — Use coupon code LM63L in order to receive 25% off your order
ePub – $6.95
Kindle – $6.95
PDF – $6.95

Createspace — Use coupon code TGERED9J in order to receive 25% off your order
Paperback – $14.95

I Miss My Mom

My mother, Sandra McKenzieThe anniversary of my mom’s death happened not so long ago and after much thought I decided not to blog about it… but today has been a hell of a day and I need to vent a little.

You know, mostly I deal well with the fact my mom is gone, I mean, as well as you can, but every once in a while life decides to pick up a stick and just jab it in all my most tender places.

Today was one of those days.

It started with seeing that Mom had given one of my books 5 stars on Goodreads two years ago (because, of course she did) and realizing she could never do that again. Then, because I’m a masochist, I followed the link from her name to her Goodreads profile and started sobbing at the list of books she ‘Wanted to Read’ but now never could.

It just got worse from there.

It’s just so fucking unfair. I miss my mom.

Fuck cancer.

Schtuff

Durr

Right. So, today when I got home from Thanksgiving dinner there was an email in my inbox asking for a high resolution photo of myself for use in some of the promo stuff for Tesseracts 17. Ever since I became overweight I’ve tried to mostly stay on the other side of the camera (I know it’s not a good thing, I know, but I do it anyway) so I don’t have any high resolution photographs of myself, so I asked Jo to snap a couple

The one up there? That was my favourite. I chose a slightly more professional one to send to the people at EDGE though 🙂

Speaking of Tesseracts 17, it has a trailer. I think this is the first book I’ve been in that had a trailer. You can check it out here:

Also in the category of ‘schtuff’ don’t forget that I’m still giving away copies of Niteblade and running a raffle for a super awesome grab bag of goodies. You can get links to the Niteblade issues by following that link, but because I’m so super awesome I’m going to re-post the rafflecopter stuff here so you don’t have to go anywhere to enter that draw 🙂

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Lastly, don’t forget that Metastasis is coming out on Tuesday. I’m super proud of this book and I can’t wait to share it with the world. What’s more, I’ll be hosting mini interviews with some of the contributors in the days following the release so you’ll want to pop by to check them out too.

Finally? Happy Thanksgiving fellow Canadians! And if you’re not Canadian, well, I hope you have a fabulous weekend anyway 😉

The Table

The Table

I don’t know anything about my father’s family, he was adopted and after he and my mother separated when I was five we never had much of a relationship. It’s a complicated and sad story and is not the point of this blog post at all. I only mention it because I think it may be one of the reasons I value the extended family on my mother’s side so very, very much.

My extended family from my Mom’s side is big. My grandmother had 10 children, 9 of whom survived by the time I was born. Those aunts and uncles married and had kids of their own and we all got together at the holidays at Grammy’s house for a big meal. It was noisy and chaotic and awesome.

The table is made of walnut and originally belonged to my great grandparents (my Mom’s father’s parents). They bought it in the 1930s or 40s (no one seems able to say for sure) and eventually passed it on to my Grammy and Grampy. As things tend to do in our family, (and maybe all big families?) this table eventually was passed down to one of my mom’s siblings, and possibly then another, but at some point it made it into our home.

It was Mom’s sewing table (and she sewed a LOT), where I learned how to quilt, the table where we put our Nintendo when we got it (like, the very first Nintendo system dudes) to play on a teeny tiny little television. It even became a diaper changing table when Danica was a baby. I went from sitting on the board beneath the table with my siblings and cousins, using the knob in the middle as a steering wheel to play imagination games while our parents played cards around us, to changing my own daughter’s diapers on it. This table means so much to me, I can’t even explain…

Then my Mom gave it to me.

By the time it reached me it had been through a lot. It was dinged and scratched. The “steering wheel” had been kicked, scuffed and even chewed on by a dog or two, and the table top had been painted dark brown to try and hide some of the water rings and such.

I decided to refinish it.

I had never refinished anything before in my life.

I was terrified.

What if I screwed up? What if I wrecked the table that probably meant just as much to other members of my family as it did to me?

What if?

But I swallowed my fears and did it anyway.

It took me a very long time, and I should have taken before pictures, but I think I’m finally finished.

Table Top

I stripped all the paint off and then sanded, and sanded, and sanded. A couple coats of stain (Cabernet by Varathane) followed, then three coats of glossy varnish (with more sanding in between, just for fun!) and a final coat of semi-gloss varnish for the top itself*. I think it’s gorgeous.

Also, for those of us who loved it, here is the steering wheel:

steeringwheel

And here are Jo and Dani putting their fingerprints all over the top because they know it drives me crazy:

fingerprints

As for why I’m sharing this on my blog, well, I may have mentioned that I have a pretty big extended family. I wanted a place I could put these pictures for everyone to see. Despite my fears, I think I did a pretty good job here. I’m proud of the results and want to show everyone else for whom this table isn’t just a piece of furniture that I’m taking care of it and giving it the respect it deserves.

Oh, and for everyone who is like “Um, it’s just a table.” well, now it’s a really pretty table. So there’s that.

Now I just need to find some chairs to go with it and tidy up the room its in 😉

*Jo and Dani helped out too but I think it’s fair to say I did the bulk of the work.

Mah New Ink

I just realized that, though I posted these pictures on Facebook, I never shared them here. I think my plan was to “wait and take a picture with my good camera first” but since I got this tattoo in like April and it’s September now, it seems safe to assume I’m never going to get around to having someone take that picture. Besides, Dani did a great job with my crappy point and shoot camera so… yeah.

Here are two photographs of my newest tattoo (It’s on the inside of my left forearm):

ink1 ink2

It’s not the tattoo I asked my artist (Kat Hays, from Atomic Zombie) for during our consult (the crows were meant to be the focus and circle around my arm), but in the end it was so wonderfully, perfectly me that I couldn’t have asked for anything more. The quill pen is amazing as is the murder of crows and I can’t get over all the little details in the ink pot (Do you see the shadow there, dudes? Awesome). The lines coming out of the pot and around the feather add just a wee bit more femininity to it and make it seem magical.

I love it.

Originally I was going to explain all the meaning and such behind it but really, I think it speaks for itself, don’t you?

Apropos of Nothing…my desktop

Do you remember a few years ago there was a meme/trend thing where people were taking screenshots of their desktops and sharing them? No? Well, trust me. In some subcultures of the internet it really was a thing. Honest.

I was thinking about that the other day. I really liked it. I think you can learn a lot about a person based on their desktop. Some people very obviously orchestrated theirs to give a certain impression, but that, too, told me a lot about them. So I thought I’d share my desktop today (and maybe again when it changes, if people are interested) because why not? And also, because I have the best desktop wallpaper ever these days.

This is the desktop of my main computer, which these days I use for both work and gaming because my laptop is on its last legs:

My Desktop (Summer 2013)

This is one of my favourite moments in wrestling ever so Jo was sweet enough to capture the screen from the dvd for me. Cause he’s cool like that.

What does your computer’s desktop look like?